The time I had almost six days to myself.

Two weeks ago, Tim was on vacation. He's been at his job for six years, I've been at mine for less than one, so we don't exactly have equal vacation time. I'd taken some unpaid time off in May, so I wasn't able to take more time off, and on that Thursday, we got up super early, drove to the airport and Tim and Elle flew to Ohio. They were gone until Tuesday, when I left work early to pick them up at the airport (and of course their flight was delayed and I encountered torrential rain on the way there and we hit rush hour traffic on the way back).

But that's six days - three times the longest amount of time I have been away from Elle since she was born almost two years ago. Tim and I are used to traveling separately and being away from each other - although not preferable, we're able to return to our long-distance relationship roots and manage short-term separations with relative ease. And he and Elle have plenty of one-on-one experience (for those not familiar with our situation, he works nights and I work days, so he takes care of Elle every morning), so I wasn't worried about her missing me terribly.

I was simultaneously excited and depressed about their trip to see our families. I knew I'd miss them, but I also knew I'd enjoy having some "me" time and the opportunity to get some stuff done around the condo.

Tim put almost 1,200 miles on the rental car and spanned the state, hitting every region except the southeast corner of Ohio (we've never had much use for the southeastern part of the state - sorry, southeastern Ohioans!). Elle was along for about half of those miles.

Elle was a trouper and traveled super well (especially considering she had to spend so much time in the car/plane and slept in unfamiliar places with people she doesn't see on a regular basis), and Tim got to see his beloved Reds and lots of his family, but we're hoping there aren't many more vacations like this, where we're separated and/or rushed and/or exhausted. 

While they were gone, I went to Spin class (twice! and to the gym without having to rush home!). I made a huge mess of the condo (and then spent time cleaning it all up). I planned a night out with friends. I ate what I wanted when I wanted and watched crap TV. I also missed Tim and Elle terribly, and while I was glad they were with family, I was jealous that I wasn't with them. It was hard to walk past Elle's door every night - open - and know that the quiet in the condo wasn't because she was peacefully sleeping in her crib.

To illustrate how a situation like this presents many conflicting emotions, I made a list of some of the things I noticed about my time by myself. Here are some things I could do that I normally cannot:

- Leave scissors out.

- Leave markers out.

- Not have to wash dishes every day or run the dishwasher more than once.

- Decide to go to the beach and just grab a towel and go - not debate the timing of the trip, if the time getting ready is worth the effort, worry about the sand that will get in all of the crevices of the baby and car, bags needed for the trip, etc.

- Spend an hour debating between two different pairs of shoes and then decide not to get either one.

- Visit 5 different (shoe) stores in about 40 minutes because I didn't have to mess with a car seat, stroller, etc. (I was having a shoe crisis, and unlike many women my age, I detest shoe shopping. Detest is actually a nice way of putting it. At one point I called my mother and expressed my anger at the genes that gave me huge, wide feet. But I digress.)

-  Go to Target even though it was monsooning out - I needed to buy stuff, darn it.

-  Eat lunch at 2:30 instead of noon because no one (other than me) was crying and whining because they were hungry and it was nap time.

- Watch TV before bedtime (like Lifetime movies and other fun stuff) instead of reading Tumford the Terrible for the tenth time that week before bedtime.

- Go to Spin class without worrying about who was going to watch my kid and "Ohmygosh I have to get home" because Tim/the sitter needs to do this and that and I need to take care of Elle.

- Sleep in until a ridiculous hour after a night out with friends. (I would probably still be sleeping except one of the cats jumped up on my dresser.)

- Have a night out with friends without paying for a sitter or worry about how early I was going to have to get up the next day.

- Leave my coffee cup on the floor while I leisurely read the newspaper.

- Change diapers.

- Leave the house whenever I wanted.

Conversely, I could not:

- Get hugs when I got home from work.

- Rock my baby before bedtime.

- Read Tumford the Terrible for the tenth time that week.

- Have a regular eating schedule.

- Spend the entire time at home because it got lonely.

- Make a freaking decision and buy the shoes already instead of wasting a ton of time deciding.

- Hear the sounds of giggles and toddler-speak that normally fill my home.

- See my family.

- See my husband's family.

Princess Elle Belle at her birthday party.

 - Attend the birthday party my husband's side of the family hosted for my almost-two-year-old daughter.

- Spend time with Tim.

- Enjoy a baseball game with my husband and his cousins.

- Make up for the fact that Tim took about seven photos on the trip (I would have been pushing 300).

I was extremely glad when they got home, despite the fact that the condo had been pristine that morning and looked like a tornado had hit within 3.4 seconds of their arrival. There was laundry to do, routines to get back in to and hugs to catch up on. It was fantastic to have a few days to myself, but I'm glad to be sharing them again :)