Pregnancy and fitness: Past, present and future.

About a month and a half ago, I hit a point where I realized I was starting to freak people out at the gym, and I enjoyed their looks of amusement/terror when they saw me run on the treadmill or hop on the elliptical with my big ol' belly. I enjoyed the same reactions during my pregnancy with Elle, although at the time I think I was more self-conscious about it and knew everyone was worried I'd go in to labor while at the gym (and actually, I kind of did, as the first signs of labor started during a weight lifting workout almost 24 hours before Elle entered the world). This time, I'm kind of impatient with the stares (and basically everything in the world) and just want to work out without being judged.

Apparently my pace isn't fast enough anymore to keep her awake.

During my pregnancy with Elle, I did a lot of strength training, but at this point my strength training is limited to carrying a 35-pound toddler and heaving myself out of bed several times a night to attend to said toddler or go to the bathroom. The cardio, though, I've been pretty good about - at least, as much as I can. It's getting harder to amble around - I haven't run in almost two months just because I don't have the energy. Elle has been a good sport and has indulged me in stroller jogs/walks a few nights a week after work, which I was eating up as long as I could, but now we're pretty much at a point where it is too hot to do much at the end of the day. (I figure at some point in the near future, we'll start hitting the pool after work for some large belly gravity-free time.) When I have crazy soreness, stiffness or pain, I hit up my favorite prenatal Pilates workouts. Not as couch potato as I feel like being, although I certainly have my moments.

At this point, 33 weeks pregnant and heading in to the thick of Florida's sticky, humid summer, I'm pleased with how active I've been thus far but also aware that I'm winding down. And while I don't feel like I'm in as good of shape as I was during my last trimester with Elle, I just don't have the time (or energy) to hit the gym 4-6 times a week. I'm getting in a workout 2-4 times a week, and my doctor says my weight gain and Wesley's growth are good, very much on track. I'm up about 20 pounds from my pre-pregnancy weight so, and I figure I'll probably gain another 5-10 pounds in the next seven weeks or so (I'm leaving room for the fluid retention that I anticipate happening as I head in the final stretch of my summer pregnancy). Dr. S. also said that three workouts a week is good right now, so to meet or beat that makes me feel good about things overall, even though I feel like a huge, fat cow 90% of the time.

Working out on vacation in the hotel gym -
27 weeks, 2 days pregnant.

 My feet have started to swell when I do too much or am on them all day. I'm physically exhausted by the afternoon, and by the time I finish working a full day, pick Elle up from daycare, make dinner, tidy up the house, bathe Elle and put her to bed, I'm completely dead. To fit in a walk after work is a huge feat (and often results in huge feet). I usually get in a walk or quick workout on the weekends.

But I'm also at the point where I'm motivated to reclaim my pre-baby body. Not that I'm dieting or going to kill myself to lose the baby weight after Wesley arrives, but I'm looking forward to having a waist again. To being able to run again without discomfort. To not only be fit, but also clear my mind during my workouts. To eat well and not have the old "But you're eating for two!" comment thrown in my face. I see people at the gym with their flat(ter) stomachs and quick movements and simultaneously feel jealous and self-righteous (I am, after all, a vessel of life).

I plan on breastfeeding Wesley, which I know will help with calorie burn, but I also distinctly remember how my flexibility for fitting workouts in between nursing sessions (and being engorged or "on call") was affected during Elle's first few months of life. In short, I might not be able to work out as much as I want to for the first few months after I resume exercise, and I'm just going to accept that.

After Elle was born, my sister and I ran a half-marathon relay. I trained for it as much as I could, and while I wasn't super speedy, I prepared enough so that I wouldn't kill or injure myself during the race. Most of my "me time" came in the form of my training runs, and I also enjoyed the added benefit of breast feeding+relay training that resulted in my weighing less - and being in better physical shape - than I had been in more than a decade. I'm looking forward to getting back to that point - being healthy and fit, feeling that sense of accomplishment after a good workout or crossing a finish line. I want to be a good fitness role model for my kids, and I am eager to incorporate them in to workouts (Elle told me tonight that she would do planks with me, although it's been months since I've done a plank and will be quite some time before I resume planking, haha). Whether it be showing Elle some stretches or packing Wesley in to the jogging stroller for a quick run, I hope I can set a long-term example for them and get back in to - and stay in - shape after this pregnancy.

Linking up with Ashley for Move It Monday:

 

Move It Monday: Working out with pregnancy #2

This pregnancy has been very much the same but very different than my first one. The similarities are big, although general - along the lines of things going pretty well aside from several weeks of nausea and fatigue. With each pregnancy, there were about 8-10 weeks where I felt like I would never feel human again, and then suddenly, I was human again.

The differences have been small but significant. This pregnancy has left me with a lot more indigestion and just a general unpleasantness regarding food. I've had a lot of weird pains with this pregnancy, from stomach pain to odd round ligament ouchies. In the last three weeks or so, I've dealt with severe sciatic nerve pain on several occasions.

The biggest differences actually involve my day-to-day life. With pregnancy #1, I was working a full-time job, part-time job and going to school through the end of my second trimester. Tim and I were on similar schedules, and we'd often go to the gym together in the late mornings before we both went to our full-time jobs, which required night and weekend hours.

 With this pregnancy, we have a toddler. We're on opposite schedules, as Tim works at night, Tuesday through Saturday, and I work during the day, Monday through Friday. If I want to go to the gym, I have to go before work, because after work involves picking Elle up from daycare, making dinner, giving Elle a bath and putting her to bed. I'm tired all. the. time. I don't HAVE to stay up and do homework or get up to work my part-time job. My full-time job is much faster-paced than the job I had when I was pregnant with Elle, and even though I'm working about the same amount of hours, my brain is constantly drained and I am mentally exhausted at the end of the day. I no longer commute 80-90 minutes a day - I am in the car for about 25-30 minutes on the way to and from work.

But despite all of the differences and changes in life in 2010 vs. life in 2013, I'm very aware of my weight-gain pattern and my workout tendencies during my pregnancy with Elle. I didn't work out much during the first trimester when I was pregnant with Elle. I think I worked out just a little bit more during this pregnancy's first few weeks. I started at a slightly lower weight this time, but I lost a few more pounds during the beginning of my pregnancy with Elle.

But at about this time in my pregnancy with Elle, I had two months of back-to-back excessive weight gain. I wasn't working out much because my classwork was ramping up, and my appetite had returned so I was enjoying the heck out of food.

This time, I'm trying hard to be as active as I can, but it's hard. I am still super tired, and work has been cra-zay. I try to take a quick lunch break walk or do 20 minutes of Zumba on the Wii at night, but some weeks it just doesn't happen. And the other issue is that I am having some intense sciatic pain, often the days after I work out. I've tried resting and I've tried moderate exercise to deal with the pain, and so far, the moderate exercise seems to be helping just a bit more. I'm trying to do more prenatal Pilates and stretching to deal with the pain, too.

I am also trying to be more aware of what I'm eating and when. I'm trying to eat more fruits and veggies. I'm trying to not just eat ice cream because I'm pregnant or take double or triple helpings because I'm "eating for two." I'd like to gain less weight overall this time, but I'd also definitely like it to be a more consistent gain.

Post-walk tonight, at 22 weeks, 3 days ... realized that
the battle of Workout Top vs. The Belly is getting more fierce every day.

I think I stopped running around week 22 with Elle. I ran a bit the last two weekends, and I was pleasantly surprised to find that aside from a little soreness in my lower back and tightness in my calves, it felt good. I remember at this point during my first pregnancy, it wasn't comfortable to run because I felt like my belly was unsupported. This time, I still feel OK while I'm running, and the only slight discomfort hours later is some hip/pelvic soreness. I figure this is natural considering I'm lugging around a banana-sized baby inside my stomach and then bouncing it up and down as I do my jog/walk intervals.

I don't expect to be in fantastic physical shape as my pregnancy continues - I didn't start in that condition, and I'm not delusional
about my fitness level. But I would like to be in decent shape, and it's important to my mental well-being to not just sit on my butt for 40 weeks and let the weight pile on. I think the relative ease I had with my pregnancy with Elle was a result of staying active (heck, I lost part of my mucus plug at the gym 24 hours before she was born). I cannot imagine pushing for two hours and going through labor with her on no sleep without having a solid  base of physical conditioning. And I genuinely enjoy working out most days, so it benefits me to stay active as much my life allows me to be.

I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to comfortably jog, but I'm going to continue it as long as I can. I had considered registering for a 5K within the last few weeks and run/walking it, but I just haven't had any consistent training. I have another doctor's appointment this week, and while I know I've gained some weight, I'm hoping it's moderate. I'd like to be able to work out more than 2-4 times a week, but at this point, with a hectic full-time job, active toddler and a schedule that hardly ever matches up with my husband's, I'll take whatever I can get and be grateful for it. 

I'm linking up with new second-time mom Ashley for Move It Monday :)

Soul, sole: Getting back to working out in new shoes

I've been fighting a battle with myself for the last few months. To make a long story short, I hit a rut with my workouts and motivation, and it was easy to me to procrastinate resuming my regular workouts. There were a lot of balls up in the air for us this summer, and exercise slipped down the priority list. I figured once some of the balls fell in to place, I would go back to my workouts, but then whoever the heck was juggling the balls threw me for several curves.

While working out is normally one of my go-to stress busters, I chose an extra hour of sleep almost every time the alarm would go off for my gym wake-up call. I think part of it is also because I don't get a lot of time with Tim, especially during the week, so it was easy for me to give in to rolling over and cuddling as a way to eek out some extra time with him, and I justified it because my anxiety was at some seriously high levels. Bottom line, I've been depressed, and I know that when I'm depressed I need to work out. Not only are the endorphins scientifically proven to help a sista out, I feel accomplished and productive when I've knocked out a workout in addition to my full day of work and household stuff.

But I had a pity party (truthfully, I'm still having it, although I've limited it to part-time with a limited guest list), and I let myself make excuse after excuse. I've let "overwhelmed and exhausted" trump "accomplished and productive" far too many times. By some small miracle, the scale has been holding pretty steady, but my flab factor feels like it has skyrocketed, and my endurance has plummeted. I needed a swift kick in the pants. I have had no drive to get up early and go run on a treadmill. I have a much easier time talking myself in to a run outside, but because of daylight/Elle constraints, the opportunities there are limited.

Last week I realized that it was super easy to skip the gym when my feet always hurt. I have massive feet, and pregnancy did them no favors, so to say I struggle with suitable, affordable footwear would be an understatement. (Also, not sure if any of you are aware, but "cute" doesn't seem to be in Big Foot's vocabulary, so I struggle with that, too, with my non-athletic footwear.) I got new running shoes earlier this year, but I never really fell in love with them. The pair before that? LOVED them. Ran many a mile and race in them before reluctantly retiring them. But the current pair? Bleh.

I had taken them back to the running store where I had purchased them and explained that - within the first week - my toes hurt. They felt numb. I was advised to wear them more often to break them in - not just while working out, but more in general. They were so-so, and I worked out in them for months, but in the last few weeks, I started to suspect that our relationship was almost over. My toes ached constantly, and even the side of my foot screamed for days after any workout. So I went back to the running store, and the sales associate took one poke at them and said "These are too small." (WHERE WERE YOU EARLIER THIS YEAR?!) So we tried some other shoes, larger sizes, etc. The big issue with my feet that they are not only long, they are wiiiiddddddeeeee. So we tried new shoe after new shoe, and finally, she asked "Have you ever tried men's shoes?" I had not, but apparently men's shoes are wider and often work well for people like me with ginormous feet.

Men's shoe, women's pasty white leg, gym's treadmill.

So far? I'm liking them a lot. I've worn a lot of New Balances in the last few years, but this is my first pair of Brooks. The sales person told me that we needed to find shoes that felt "A-MAY-ZING." I told her I would likely never say a shoe felt amazing unless it was my beloved two-generations-ago running shoe, so she should probably kiss that expectation goodbye. But I'm liking these. My toes are liking these. They don't look like men's shoes, although I'm not exactly trying to win fashion awards at the gym, so that doesn't really matter to me. I have 10 days to try them out, but they can't show wear if I need to return them, so I'm hitting the treadmill and elliptical to test them.

I'm hoping these shoes will help turn around my workout aversions and subsequently help me snap out of my funk. I'm registering for a few 5Ks next month to further motivate me and get some miles on the shoes. The weather in Florida is finally showing signs of cooling off to manageable temperatures and humidity levels, so running a few races is actually ideal. Another perk? Running races around the holidays always seems to help me get through the pumpkin pie haze and mashed potato fests that I tend to indulge in around this time of year. Win, win, win.

Not so big of a win? The jogging stroller with a 30+ pound opinionated toddler - it's a completely different monster (or "monstah," as Elle would say) than it was when we were running in the spring. But that's a blog post for another day ...

Linking up with Ashley, who never fails to entertain and inspire me with her posts, especially as she shares her pregnancy and fitness tales:

 

10K recap and thoughts on running

In summary: I survived!

The weather was great, the course was pretty and I was able to get a good night's rest the night before. I had to drive about 45 minutes south to get to the race, so I was up at 5:30. Traffic was light, so the drive went fast. I parked a mile away so I could leave the race as soon as I was done (the course was closed until all of the runners finished, and on-site parking would have kept me there waaayyyy longer than I wanted to stay).

The race was supposed to start at 7:15, but there were some issues with a severe lack of portable toilets, so they waited until they could get the lines down before they started the race and the start was delayed about 20 minutes. I've found that I've become more of a race snob with the more races I've run — I am particular and judgmental about how well organized things are, including whether they start on time, things are well marked, etc. This race wasn't the best in terms of organization, but the turnout was good — not too many people, but a decent crowd.

I haven't been able to train as much as I've wanted — I just can't handle long runs with the stroller, and while Elle is good with being stuck in the stroller, I don't like to test her patience too much. It was extremely nice to not push the stroller on race day, but I missed my little training buddy a bit :) I don't have the tolerance or time for longer treadmill runs, which is where I run on weekday mornings.

The weather has been getting warmer fast, and that makes for some not-so-enjoyable training runs as well. The weather on race day was a little bit humid, but it was along water, so there was a nice breeze for the majority of it, too.

The 6.2 miles was the longest race I've run. I was prepared to walk a considerable bit, but when I got out there I hit a good rhythm and ran about 95% of it. My pace was good for the first three miles, but my endurance definitely wasn't where it needed to be to keep up a good pace for the entire run, so I finished with an 11:30-minute mile pace. This isn't terrible considering I ran an 11-minute mile pace at the Thanksgiving five-miler I ran ... and I could barely walk for the next three days after that. I think I was in much better physical shape this time and recognized my limits while still challenging myself.

This time I wasn't in much pain until yesterday and today, when I have been sitting a lot more. My ankles hurt the first two days post-race, and yesterday my legs were tight, but I wasn't hobbling around or hearing joints pop and crack with every move. I have found that when I'm running a lot I crave dairy products — last weekend on my longer run days I wanted cheese, cheese and chocolate milk. Even during the 10K, I was imagining ice cream and cheese. And subs. With cheese. I headed to Subway for lunch and felt like I could die happy.

When I register for these races, I think it's a great idea. But when I get up early, staying in bed sometimes sounds like a MUCH better idea. Sheer stubbornness and knowing that I've already forked over the registration money are what get me out of bed. Some people are motivated by others, but running by myself is pretty normal for me, and crossing the finish line without anyone there to see me is what I'm used to, although I admit it's a little anti-climatic.

I sometimes wonder why I continue to register for these runs — paying money, losing sleep, etc. But it feels good. It feels good to have something for me, take the time for myself. It feels good to see different parts of the state during these races and get fresh air. It feels good to meet new people, like the woman I walked with from the parking area to the race area — I'll probably never see her again, but we talked about running, our kids and the event (dis)organization in the 20 minutes before they told us to start. It feels good to put the miles in and burn the calories and get stronger. It feels good to step away from the computer, the chores, the stresses and demands of every day life, and hit the pavement to let my mind wander.

The 10K was a good time to think, definitely, but not stress out. I saw women passing me with double strollers and I said a silent "You go, Mama." I saw some funny shirts, including "I forgot to train" worn by a group of women and "Race official: Do not pass" worn by two women who were definitely not race officials. I thought about all of the high school classmates I know who run now, too — we didn't run in high school, but the "bug" bit us a few years later and now there are a lot of people posting statuses about training, registration and race results. This race wasn't run for a specific charitable cause, so I wasn't overly emotional like I get during the breast cancer 5Ks I've run. I was happy with my finish and knew I'd a) finished strongly and b) have plenty of room to improve. I'm not all that interested in running longer races, so improving my time is a definitely obtainable goal.

The last few weeks marked a change in my runs — instead of feeling like it was an obligation to run, I wanted to go run. It was my escape. Elle was particularly fussy and disagreeable one Saturday morning, and I had been planning on taking a run with her after her nap. Even though I knew she would fall asleep and possibly ruin her nap time, we headed out in the stroller before lunch, because I just needed a break and figured she'd enjoy the scenery. She was happy and calm for the 20 minutes before she fell asleep, and then I just kept running. It was peaceful, it was refreshing, and I came home feeling renewed and ready to face more whining. (Well, not ready, but in a better place, perhaps?) Instead of coming home with a list of things to do or blog about or worry about (the things I normally fill my running time with), I feel like my mind has wandered more, relaxed more, during my recent runs. During the race, I daydreamed up a possible weekend trip for the three of us, but that's about it — I didn't pack my mind with to-dos and deep thoughts and stresses, and I remember more of each mile marker and the scenery than I can remember about most of my races.

Last Sunday, Tim was home, and I could have left Elle with him as I went out on a long run, but she wanted to come with me when she found out I was heading out for a run. I took her out for three miles and listened to her sing and chatter while I sweated and pushed through my normal neighborhood loop. It makes it easier to head out for a run when she's looking forward to it, too. When I brought her home before heading out for another two miles on my own, she was really upset and kept asking to get back in the "troller." I love that Elle gets excited when we go for stroller runs and she can see both Tim and I as active role models, but it was sooo nice for me to be able to finish my run without pushing 30+ pounds of baby gear and toddler.

The rest of Saturday was quiet, and I tried to not back ALL of the calories I'd burned that morning (the sub and any subsequent cheese or ice cream were necessary, though). Elle and I went to the open house of a new swim gym on Saturday when I got back from the race. She went in the bounce house, got her face painted and made a new friend (playing in puddles: bringing toddlers together since the beginning of time).

Me, post-race; Elle, post-face painting

I was just proud that I was still wide awake, able to move and grateful that the layer of the salt from my sweat that morning had been showered away. I was aware that I needed to drink more water and giddy for her nap time, because I was going to nap, too. We both slept for more than two hours, and I was out COLD.

Not running at my normal weekend times felt odd — we didn't have to worry about going for a run before dinner, because I had done my run for the day. But on Sunday, it felt weird to not run. We went for a two-mile family walk in the morning, but then ... my day was open. It's nice to have breaks like that after you've been training for an event. I'm heading back to the gym tomorrow morning, but these last few days of walks and stretches have been really, really enjoyable.

My "race season" is unofficially over until fall - it is just too hot to run outside in the Florida summer. I have plans to take some spinning classes (thank you, Living Social deal!) and we're looking in to joining a new gym, which would allow me more workout options, especially on the hot weekend days when I am just not going to drag Elle out in the stroller for what will then be an agonizing run.

A day late, but linking up with Move It Monday:

Ashley has been setting mini-goals for the last two weeks, and I've got a few of my own this week:

* Drink 72+ ounces of water each day
* Lose a pound
* Workout four or more days
* Track my calories five or more days

So far I'm good on the water and have tracked two days of food ... the workouts begin tomorrow!

Needing a kick in the running shorts.

My running coworkers.

 Last week, I ran in a 5K with some coworkers. I was originally planning to run the 10K, but after battling a nasty cold for two weeks and dealing with some minor injuries, I decided it was best not to push myself. I was also breaking in some new shoes (which are still creating some discomfort, bah), and I was hoping to set a new PR ... and failed. Since I haven't really been racing since I got pregnant with Elle, I guess I should be happy with my time (31:55), but I was really hoping to come in under 30 minutes.

I had a decent pace for the first mile, killed my second mile and then promptly slowed waaaayyyyy down for my final mile. Awesomesauce.

 One of my coworkers has caught the running bug, though, so we're already discussing other 5Ks to run before it gets ridiculously hot in Florida. And I'm going to run a 10K - but I'm shooting for one in mid-April so I have plenty of time to properly break in the new shoes and train.

As for my weight loss challenge with Tim, I gained some ground when he was out of commission from his surgery and when I was sick and had absolutely no appetite. I lost three pounds that week, and Tim was unable to work out until his staples were removed. But then we had an extremely rough patch of sleep with Elle, and I missed a few trips to the gym.

Now we're all back to "normal," but with that has come struggles - pizza at work, birthday celebrations, girls' night, inclement weather preventing stroller runs with Elle, etc. The good news is that I'm definitely much more conscious of my portion sizes and decisions, and I can feel the small difference in the way my clothes fit. The bad news is that I definitely need to refocus. It's always good to see some progress, but it is always hard for me to not get complacent and to keep challenging myself. I find myself tracking my calories up until dinner time, and that has to stop. I eat well at work because I can eat only what I've packed. When I get home, though, I'm at the mercy of my willpower, as every trip to the kitchen holds temptation.

Bottom line: Sometimes it's hard to stay motivated, even when you start to see results.

Having the 10K to train for definitely keeps me active, but my eating is something that I always need to be mindful of - and it always seems like when I'm losing weight I crave sweets the most.

Linking up with Ashley for 

 

Step by step.

Less than two weeks ago, I was struck by the desire to register for a race so I could train for it. I checked the event schedule for my local runners club and saw a Thanksgiving event. It was a five-mile run, but it was free, which is rare, rare, rare in the running world. All that was required of registered runners was a donation for a food bank and food to share with the other runners (fruit, granola bars, etc.)

I signed up for it, figuring that I would run/walk it. It would be a good way to be active during what was sure to be a string of heavy-eating days. But I haven't run five consecutive miles in months, and my mileage has been fairly low since spring. I run several times a week, but I usually do 2-3 miles of interval work on a treadmill.

The night before the run, Tim told me he had to take photos of it for his newspaper. I was excited that he and Elle would be coming to the race with me, but I felt a bit of pressure to finish in a timely fashion since they would be waiting for me. We got to the race early and hung out together until close to the 8 a.m. start time. Then Tim and Elle went to take photos for the paper, and I stretched and got ready to run.

The weather was awesome - a bit chilly, sunny and not humid or windy. The first mile was pretty easy - I started to warm up and was just focusing on holding a steady pace.

At the beginning of the race.

The second mile was a bit easier. By mile marker 3, I felt like things were going fast. I figured if I was going to walk, this would be a good time to start. But instead, I kept running.

The time between miles 3 and 4 seemed to last forever. By the time I hit mile 4, I hadn't walked - and decided I wasn't going to. I was on pace to finish in less than 55 minutes. For a lot of people, that's not super impressive - I would be averaging 11-minute miles. But since I hadn't trained at all and have never broken a 10-minute average in a race, I wasn't too worried about "a lot of people."

I ran my heart out in that last mile. I passed people, I muttered to myself, I calculated and re-calculated how much further I needed to go to reach the finish line. I knew that I would be super disappointed if I didn't make the 55-minute mark and missed it by a few seconds.

And it was at that point that I realized, burning calves and all, that I had the willpower to do it. And I have the determination to keep up on this weight-loss journey. It's not always easy, but I'm stubborn, and when I want something to work, I make it work. I don't like quitting. I don't like failing. This is a good thing and a bad thing, but in this instance, I felt like I had an awakening that left me confident about what I'm facing. (It also left me with the inability to walk without pain for the rest of the day and sore calves for the rest of the weekend.) But by running those five miles without stopping, I felt awesome and determined. It was one of those moments that I can go back to when I'm feeling weak or lazy and remember the surge of determination and will-power. It's not about looking at how much weight I want to lose - it's every bite, every step, every choice. They all add up, and they're in my control and completely manageable. By piecing together five separate miles, I knocked out the entire race. If I just take that approach with every meal I eat and every workout I finish, I'll be making forward progress toward my weight loss goals.

My official race time was under 55 minutes. I didn't even look at my time as I barreled across the finish line, so I was glad that Tim got the photo of me below, documenting my time, and even more pleased that the official race results had me finishing in 54:07.

Blurry butt.

I'm looking forward to running more races (and training for them so I'm not so sore!) in the coming months and working on working out to help me reach my weight loss goals. Tim and I are even considering running the half-marathon relay together. And I've already reached back to that race as an example of the determination/stubborness that I need - and have - to get to where I want to be. Anyone who has ever struggled to lose weight can tell you that the holidays are an extremely hard time, but I'm just trying to be aware of what I'm putting in my mouth and what I'm doing in the gym.

A sweaty mess post-race.

Linking up with Move It Monday and

Weighty matters

I did really well losing my baby weight, which shocked me because I've never had an easy time with weight loss or weight maintenance. I was breastfeeding, I was a busy mama who didn't have a lot of time to eat, I was mindful of what I was putting in my mouth and enjoyed working out - either with the baby or as "me time." I was actually about 10 pounds lower than my pre-pregnancy weight for a while, and I was happy with it. When I trained for the half-marathon relay with my sister, I made a huge effort to run several miles a week, several days a week, so I wouldn't injure myself or make the papers by dying during the race because I was out of shape. I like pictures of me from around that time - I look healthy and healthy.

At a happier weight.

But soon after the half-marathon relay, it got super hot in Florida, and I didn't run outside much. That means I run on a treadmill now, or a "dreadmill" as some runners call it. I don't mind the treadmill - my gym has a TV on each one, it's easy to keep track of my distance and time, and it's in an air-conditioned, dry environment. In Florida, the "too hot for Kristin to run outside" season lasts from April until about November. But I don't exactly push myself when I run indoors. I get bored easily, so I do intervals (varying speed and incline as well as rest periods of walking), and I by the time I drive there and drive back, I'm cornered in to a fairly tight window of time. I went shopping the other day (for boots, mostly, but I was also looking at cute fall tops), and I was absolutely depressed by the time I was done. I hated the way everything looked on me, the way I looked in the fitting room mirror. I'm not happy in my own skin. I don't like to look at photos of myself.

Something needs to change.

My weekly mileage is far less than it was earlier this year. I'm no longer breastfeeding. I've been traveling and celebrating, and therefore packing the pounds back on. I'm back to around my pre-pregnancy weight (fluctuating to a bit higher sometimes, shamefully), but as a person who has been frequently told she "hides her weight well," I fear that I'm no longer hiding it well. It pretty much goes to my belly and hangs out there. And my face. And I just hate knowing that I'm carrying around extra pounds.

I've always struggled with my weight (and that's another topic for another post). And I've always been very conscious of my weight, to a point where it's been downright unhealthy. A few months ago, when I realized my clothes were fitting more snuggly, I tried to watch what I ate. I've now realized I could write a series on the eating habits of (the majority of) journalists. In summary, it's not pretty. Sit at a desk. Work crazy hours. Operate on tight deadlines. Exist on caffeine and sugar to get you through the crazy hours and tight deadlines. Collapse. Rinse, repeat. Which leaves little room for eating healthy or exercising regularly unless you make it a priority. And I do, more than a lot of people. But I also can't say no to the office candy jar. I give in to treats quite easily. And I found that because of my work/sleep schedule, I was eating very little when I was home during the morning and afternoon, and then I was grazing at work (on healthy stuff that I had packed, but still, continuously eating). I would eat a salad, grapes, yogurt, a granola bar, etc. I seemed to operate better on a steady flow of food. But when I tracked my calories, it really added up. And I'd often be starving for something when I got home, when my willpower was weakest.

Not even two weeks in to the new job, and I can see where my new schedule might be a very, very good thing in helping me lose the weight and tone up. I'm waking up early to go to the gym. I'm going for walks with Elle in the evenings and weekends. (Including two runs/walks outside with the stroller this weekend when the weather was absolutely phenomenal.) I make dinner for us each night, and I'm trying to prepare healthy food (using a lot of recipes from Gina's Skinny Taste). The office is so small and I'm so new that I don't feel comfortable eating like I did at my old job - I'm eating my three square meals and sometimes a snack at night. (My weekend eating habits are still wonky, but you gotta start somewhere!) I'm not eating super late. There's no office candy jar. These people don't even know that I have a baking blog!

I'm still not as consistent as I'd like to be with tracking my calories (I've been using MyFitnessPal), but I'm taking steps in the right direction. I've worked out five days in a row, including three days before work. My clothes are fitting a bit better already, just a few weeks in my "re-commitment." I don't think trying to implement a complete life overhaul while undergoing the major transition to the new job and schedule is the best thing, but as a college friend of mine used to say, I'm just being "the best Kristin I can be." (Hi Cindy!) Being back at my pre-pregnancy weight isn't a bad thing, but since that number was a good 10 pounds above where I wanted to be anyway, I'm not pleased with where I am and how I am. Do I wish it were easier? Yes. But it is what it is. 

My goals are to tone up, feel better about myself and drop 18 pounds, which includes a few pounds that have always been a PITA to get rid of. (I'm down one already, whee!) I'm going to do it in a smart way and take it slow and steady with a combination of watching what I eat and working out. I want to be able to look at photos of myself and not cringe. Feel strong and fit. Have more energy.

And when I reach my goal, go shopping for a new wardrobe :)

Linking up with:

Race recap

My sister, Marti, and brother-in-law, Jeff, came to visit a few weeks ago. The timing of their visit was planned around a half marathon relay that my sister and I registered to run. My sister has run several races, from 5Ks to half marathons, and I've run a few 5Ks, but no races since several months before I found out I was pregnant. And after I had Elle, recovery from the delivery of Gigantor left me in pain for two months. I thought I might never run without pain again.

Thankfully, that was not the case, and running the half marathon relay with my sister was excellent motivation to get back on the running, um, train, as well as an athletic bonding experience with my sister. It was certainly challenging to find time to train, but in the end, I was comfortable with where I was at: Slow, but not at risk to physically hurt myself by running my 5.5-mile leg.

I took a few days off work for my family's visit. We realized a few weeks before the race that the run was the morning after daylight saving time, meaning we'd be running early in the morning on one less hour of sleep. Whee! I ended up getting about four hours of sleep the night before we ran, but Marti and I got up early and headed to the race site around 5:30 a.m. My leg of the relay was first, but since we were there with plenty of time to spare, we hung out together with other runners until close to the 7 a.m. start time, when Marti headed to the relay area.

It might seem that I had the easier part of the race - after all, a half marathon is 13.1 miles, and my leg was 5.5 miles. Marti was going to run 7.6 miles. The night before the race, though, we were looking at the course map when we realized that there was an incline on the first leg of the course. No problem, I thought. I'd only trained on a flat area in my neighborhood, but it certainly couldn't be *that* much of an incline, could it?

Let's just sum it up this way: One of the other runners said that the relay was divided not evenly in distance, but evenly in difficulty, and I have to agree. The course was an area I've driven on countless times to one of my favorite aquariums, but I'll never look at the bridges that I ran over the same. It was cold at 7 a.m., and there was a breeze. Although it was dark when we started, as the sun came up, the view of the water as we ran over the causeway was amazing. The words "ran uphill both ways" kept going through my head as I battled the wind and incline, but the sun came out around mile 2 and I started to hit my stride. By mile 4, I'd taken off my sweatshirt and thrown on my sunglasses. And right around then, I decided that a faster pace was sustainable for the remaining 1.5 miles and maybe it would be better if I could just power through the last of the bridge. I ended up motoring through the last 1.5 miles and met Marti at the relay exchange, when she took this picture of me approaching:

Then I wandered around for a bit and waited for Marti to run on her flat portion of the course return to the relay exchange area, where we would run in the last tenth of a mile and cross the finish line together.

As we joked about preparing for a perfect picture finish, Marti pointed out a surprise on the left side of the finish line: Jeff, Tim and Elle! We had told our husbands not to bother coming to the race. As nice as it would have been to see them after finishing, I didn't want to disrupt Elle's nap schedule, especially with the time change, and with transportation, traffic and timing issues, we didn't think it was worth the hassle for the boys to battle the crowds and meet us. But I have to admit, it was AMAZING to see them and have them watch us cross the finish line. I was very thankful that Tim had decided to surprise me, called and picked up Jeff at the hotel and battled the crowds to find us.

Elle: Unimpressed. Me: Thrilled!

I had done a lot of people watching while I ran and waited for Marti, and I was inspired by the mother/daughter teams, the kids cheering their fathers on, the babies in strollers guarded by relatives waiting for the babies' parents to complete the race. I kept wishing that Elle could be there to see me finish, that someday we would be able to participate in events like this as a family or even do a relay together. And there she was, with Tim and Jeff, watching her mommy and aunt cross the finish line.

Our "official" race photo.

It was an amazing surprise, and it actually worked out really well with her nap schedule. The boys and Elle joined us for the post-race breakfast, and I let Elle eat some banana and yogurt, so she was in heaven.

I felt good after the race. Tired, but good. The weather ended up being perfect by the end of the race, and I wasn't sore or sick from the run. Marti and I placed 48th out of 68 relay teams (there was also an option to run the straight half marathon with no relay), and we were pleased with that, since we weren't really doing it to break any time records. I was just pleased that I managed to run 5.5 miles and not die. A group of women saw me with Elle as we were eating breakfast, and they congratulated me on running "so soon" after having Elle (I didn't explain to them that she was several months old). I had demanded requested donuts after completing the run, and Marti brought a half-dozen delicious donuts over later that morning. YUM. My basic needs had been met, so I was happy.

Family photo <3

Burning oodles of calories before 9 a.m., taking in the beautiful sunrise, checking out the scenery as I crossed the bridge, getting donuts, experiencing a bonding experience with my sister, being surprised by my family, holding my daughter after finishing the race ... all in all, an excellent Sunday morning :)

Sisterly bonding complete: Post-run, pre-donuts :)

Saturday morning date

Tim and I got up early and ran in the St. Stephen's Episcopal School Falcon Fitness 5K on Saturday morning. We both had to work later in the day, but we're crazy and went anyway. It was an unusually chilly Florida morning - it was 34 degrees when we woke up and only about 45 when the race began. Most of the course was sunny, and there wasn't much wind, but I'm used to running in much more humid and warm air, so it was a bit of a shock. The course was gorgeous - lots of beautiful homes (I found one I am convinced we need to buy) and a long stretch along the Manatee River.

It was Tim's first race - he finished in 23:40 and has decided to become a professional runner. I improved my October 5K time (of 33:34) but had hoped to break 30 minutes - I finished in 30:19. This race had lots of age divisions, and Tim was overly excited that at 40, he was in the Masters division. I was merely in the 25-29 division, and considering every in my age group as well as most people not in my age group passed me, I wasn't too confident in placing in my age group. (We're talking 70-year-old men, 8-year-old girls, pretty much 200 of the 300 or so runners finishing ahead of me. But whatever. I never claimed to be a runner, and I'm just glad I finished.)

We also got good post-race food - parfaits, fruit, bagels, etc. - and a cool T-shirt and loaded goody bag for registering. I might have to share the contents of the goody bag at a later date.

Here we are after finishing the race:

Lovely.

You all know that Tim and I work nights and therefore sleep late, right? So when we need to get up early, it's hard to a) go to sleep early and b) function.

But we did go to bed early and get up early on Friday night/Saturday morning for the 5K. It was cold by Florida standards (46 degrees) as we got up at 6:30, left the condo at 7:15 and walked to the MCC campus. As we walked, half-asleep, we talked about how weird it was that there was no traffic. Hardly any cars on campus. Hmm. We got to the gymnasium, where the registration was/race was supposed to start, and it was locked. Deserted. There were no signs, no other confused would-be runners. Nothing.

We've done some investigating since then (you know, after we walked back to the condo, went back to sleep for several hours and cursed the race organizers for waking us up for no reason). Apparently the race was canceled at some point. Letters were sent out to registered runners saying that MCC regreted canceling the 5K, but because of scheduling issues, the race was off for now.

But we never got the letter. We don't know if our registration was received. Thankfully, the registration check has not been cashed, but we'd really like to know how the race was mysteriously removed from existence. We are hoping to get more answers, but for now, we're just puzzled. And Tim now has reason to refuse any other 5Ks I offer up (including one we're discussing for next month). Oh well.

Wooo, a real post!

We have really not done much since the holidays. We haven't had much time off together, but we do this weekend (two whole days!) and plan to watch the Steelers on Sunday and go to the aquarium in Sarasota on Monday. I'm excited.

The biggest news lately has been combining our cell phone plans, shopping at Target and making tacos. While this is all fine and good, it's not exactly blog-worthy (although I guess I just blogged about it). We also got a new home theater system, and Tim has been teaching Mario, the older, smarter cat, how to open the front door. (I'll have to post photos and video of that "wonderful" feat later.)

In late December, my St. Pete gym membership ended, and we were going to the park a lot to run for our exercise. The Bradenton YMCA had no joining fees in January, so we waited until Jan. 2, and then we joined. It's not the nicest facility I've ever been in, but I'm excited to be able to take classes again (Zumba and step - sadly, no Spinning), and it's nice to have the option of elliptical and treadmill to mix in with our park runs. Tim's hoping to play basketball. The Y is right next to the park, so he can run at the park while I work out at the Y, and hopefully he'll take advantage of the Y when the weather is rainy or just too stinking hot.

But in equally big fitness news, Tim and I are running a 5K on Saturday. It's at Manatee Community College, which is less than a five-minute walk from the condo. Granted it's at 8 a.m., but Tim really had no excuse NOT to do this one with me. And it benefits the MCC athletic department, and MCC's team name is the Lancers. Tim played for the Lincolnview Lancers in high school. While I usually enjoy doing these kinds of things when they benefit something like stray animals or breast cancer research, at least I'm not running to support puppy mills. I'm hoping to improve on my previous running time, but I won't have a running buddy (like my friend Julia during October's race) to help pace/push me. And I'm guessing Tim will be done, home, showered and *hopefully* be making breakfast by the time I finish. He's a teeny bit faster than me.

And now, a cute photo to close: